Here we go with Part 2 of my craziest modeling stories!
I suggest you read My Craziest Modeling Experiences – Part 1 before jumping into this one if you haven’t already.
Fast forward from my last story about a month, I think. That would have been within my first month or two of modeling. I wasn’t doing nudes yet, but I’d had some successful shoots and finally got my first paid offer. It was $10 an hour to do a lighting test. The photographer suggested I bring some of my goth outfits. Goth modeling was one of the styles I really wanted to get into, so I was excited.
Issues with Ish
The photographer who I’m going to call Ish (which is actually part of the name he was using at the time) first complained that the clothes I brought had too much black in them. Apparently, his camera did not shoot black (or red) well. If that sounds fishy to you considering he asked to shoot goth, you’re not alone.
Next, he asked me to help him move a very heavy solid wood table so I could pose on it. After that, he proceeded to tell me that my body was lumpy. He asked me to smile more at one point. When I did he said something like “Well, don’t do THAT again!”. I guess he thought I did not have a good smile. He also scolded me because I didn’t know how to pose myself well, a fact that I had informed him of before we booked.
The “best” part happened at one point when I was posing on the table. Something happened, I think he might have tripped on a cord, and his light and tripod both went falling. He seemed upset with me because I didn’t leap off the table and try to save them. Even if I had tried, I wouldn’t have been able to because they were too far away.
I think he did pay me and I told myself there was no way I was ever doing that again. It wasn’t worth the money, no matter how badly I needed it (which was pretty bad at the time).
The Marlboro Man
Now we get to move on to one that wasn’t so much the photographer’s fault as it was just odd… I think this was nearing my second year shooting and one of my dreams was to do a nude shoot with a horse.
I should mention a side note here: I had been working with horses since I was about ten volunteering at a riding school for the disabled. I’d had a lot of experience handling horses but could never afford to take lessons. So this wasn’t totally a whim, no experience thing in regards to being around horses.
I’d never shot with this photographer before, but I think we’d talked a bit and shooting with horses was on my shoot wishlist. He had found a farm willing to let us shoot. It also supposedly had a private space to shoot.
The handler had two horses. One of them was definitely prettier, but also pretty skittish. The other was a bit shaggier looking, but definitely more laid back. I chose him.
Being responsible as a model, I’d only worn a tank top dress that I could slip off. The handler suggested I ride the horse to the shooting spot to get used to him.
A few minutes later, he started leading the horse onto a path into a bunch of trees. This is when he began telling me about how he could have been the Marlboro man. No, I’m not joking. If he was, he never let on. Apparently, he’d auditioned for a commercial or something years before.
As we went on, the path was getting narrower and my legs and feet were getting scratched to bits by the branches. The horse tried to stop a couple of times, but he kept urging him on. By the time we got to the clearing, I had little cuts all over and there were little streaks of blood all over my legs and feet.
We tried shooting with me on the horse, but he wouldn’t standstill. He wasn’t trying to run off either. He just didn’t seem to care for the idea of being still. Eventually, we gave up on that and I got off to take a few portraits standing next to him.
It ended up being a wash. I was so incredibly disappointed.
The Car Shoot
When I first started modeling, I wanted to get into pin-up with rat rods and classic cars. My boyfriend at the time was into those things. He knew someone who owned a garage as well as a few car owners.
I thought doing classical art nude poses with the cars and in a garage would be a really amazing concept. I set up a shoot day with a few photographers and I lined up a few cars.
A couple of days before the shoot the one car I’d really wanted to pose with became unavailable. The owner told me that he was concerned about a nude model posing on his car because… (wait for it)… all nude models get sexually aroused when they pose nude. He was afraid the resulting “fluids” would erode the clear coat on his car. I’m pretty sure that was an elaborate story that roughly translated to “my girlfriend found out and she’s not okay within.”
I was disappointed, but not worried at that point because we still had the garage and a few other cars lined up. No big deal other than it having been the car I’d actually sketched out specific poses for.
Next, the day before the shoot the garage owner said he might be a bit late because he was out of town. That developed into some complicated story about his hunting club and not being able to get away. Of course, he kept stringing me along. He never flat out canceled. It wasn’t until the morning of the shoot that I made the call that he wasn’t going to show and ended up having to contact the photographers and tell them it was canceled.
I was crying the whole time, devastated. This was the first time I’d tried to plan something and it failed so miserably. It wasn’t my fault beyond perhaps choosing to set things up with someone who clearly didn’t care. However, I still felt like the whole thing made me look unprofessional and that was (and still is) one of my fears as a model.
More Lessons Learned
These experiences taught me a lot about planning more thoroughly in advance. I also learned that I can’t just trust people to do what I feel they’re supposed to do, even if it’s common sense. The first one also inspired me to be more assertive and to value my own time.
These stories are also pretty amusing for me to look back on. Thankfully they’re all just bad stories, no serious damage was done. I gained some important experience from them and I feel that I’ve come so far that I can look back and just shake my head. Life is definitely entertaining!
I hope you guys found these two posts about some of my experiences fun and entertaining to read. I’m pretty good at avoiding issues now and this was a big step for me because people could really judge me based on these. However, I wanted to share anyway.
